Saturday, July 19, 2008

Under the shoulder pads

Be prepared for a petty blog. Yes, there are some weighty issues out there on the political landscape at the moment and maybe this whole blog is silly but just where are John McCain's shoulders?

I get that since Richard Nixon went on television with five o'clock shadow to debate John Kennedy that making up your candidate to look good on television is a prime objective of any support team. And they clearly failed on covering the age spots on the back of his hand during his Viagra moment.

But for me the whole shoulder pad thing has been carried to the extreme and he is beginning to look like Tammy Faye minus the false eyelashes.

He doesn't have a neck to begin with and he already has the beginning of a stoop (early sign of prostrate cancer or just age), and I understand that he has issues with his arms because of what was done during his imprisonment as a POW. But he has big enough shoulder pads to serve as flotation devices should his plane go down over water. They are so big and stiff that it hinders natural movement. On a recent video of him in a town hall meeting predicting an up turn in terror attacks before the November elections (prediction or promise?) he looked like a robot in a suit of armor.

We are told he is very fit, but where are all the standard political campaign images of the candidates jogging past the capital building? We have Obama playing basketball. And blowing it on bowling but I want to see McCain in gym shorts. Does his workout suit have the same shoulder pads? I have seen women jogging outfits with shoulder pads. I imagine his campaign can rig up some for their candidate speed walking around the mall before the stores open.

Fibbing to the public about the health of our presidents is an old story. FDR made it a point to never appear in a wheel chair or even with crutches though he was severely crippled. We were kept from the truth about the severity of JFK's back issues. It was years after he left office that we discovered he had not drawn a sober breath for his last 13 months in office. And what is the truth about GW falling off the couch? Do you believe the pretzel story?

I am not looking for any national security information to be revealed here. I just want to know what is under that suit of iron he wears? Does he have shoulders at all? And how much bigger are those shoulder pads going to get as the campaign moves forward?